2018 is marking it's end,and here I'm losing one more year which couldn't become beautiful because i again failed letting her know what i feel about her.
Inside me (I wish i could go on a date with you. It would be the best day of mine probably, i wish it come true..!!
Idea what if i indirectly ask her out for a meet, it would be just a meet but i can consider it as date, but how should i ask her??)
Everytime i miss her, there's a silent ache in my heart which is definitely unbearable. There is an ache that comes and goes, always returning in quiet moments. I want so much to keep you close, to talk and laugh like we once did and I know that your absence is down to me. Please understand that nothing good can come of this right now and I'd rather take the pain sooner than later.
I inexorably managed to send her a last message,asking some questions what she want from me before 2018 ends?
And here are the choice
1) A strong friendship
2) A hangout
3) Date
4) picture together
5) A good laugh
It was her drift to reply and i was wishing an ans as 3rd option , but 5th option was her choice. I enduringly asked her out to meet so that we could spend good time in sync and could laugh together, & she accepted it.
20th dec 2018
5:00pm
I could hear her footsteps coming towards me,her footsteps were light and timid as she slowly approached, watching me through skittish wide eyes. I can only imagine what might be going through her mind, thoughts like, what does she think of me? Oh, I’m so ugly! Does she like me?
with each step my mind became more clear, more resolute, as if the growing physical distance between us had now become an emotional chasm. As the nascent sunlight caressed her skin, promising a new dawn, a new beginning, she entombed her memories in thick walled ice. Then, abruptly pausing to close my eyes and take in a deep breath of dewy air, she steeled herself to only think of her future from here on in.
A future she would mould, build, direct. Then with each stride after that she felt more in charge, in command of her own mind, body and soul. She was a girl walking into her own destiny, a destiny that lay squarely in her own hands.
We ordered food from the menu,& started having our favourite cuisines, it was completely magical moments for me. She filled every pause and breath with more chatter. That moment was much as paused to take a bite she'd start rambling off in a new direction entirely, Should her dateget a word in edgeways.
she laughed before punchlines and for things that just weren't that funny, the weather changed it's mood into our favour, having our favourite ice cream. I smiled at her, hoping to lighten the burden she carries on herself. Then something amazing happens, like a light turning on in a dark room, her eyes lighten and she smiles back. Wow, I wonder, smiles really do have power. They can reach places the sun can’t and warm the very soul.
Time striked 9:00pm, time to say bye as she was running late,i didn’t want to say goodbye to her this early.
It was great time being with you, i would love to meet you again soon she quoted and left.
I was wordless that evening and didn't confessed what i was up too.
I was awakened by my mobiles alarm & realised it was a dream. Let me tell you one thing that when you are sleeping and your alarm got rang with all loud noise, it shakes you like the hell has exploded, and this morning my dream date shattered into pieces.
Sometimes when I look at the ocean or an especially large mountain range, I feel overwhelmed and small, but in a good way. It’s comforting to know there’s something out there bigger than I am, and my feelings for you are bigger than my dream date.
These feelings I have for you can't end until my body ceases to function and my soul is released for whatever comes after. I hope that somehow they are embedded into my soul, that our love will endure.
IG Storytelleradityaraj
Post settings Labels Published on 20/12/2018 09:45 Pacific Daylight Time Permalink Location Options
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